When it comes to forming meaningful connections, many of us focus on the wrong qualities. We often prioritize physical attractiveness, financial security, and social standing, but research shows that these qualities can actually create distance instead of closeness. According to happiness expert Sonja Lyubomirsky and relationship researcher Harry Reis, the key to feeling loved is not about trying to impress others, but about being known and understood.
Five Core Myths
Lyuobmirsky and Reis identify five core myths that interfere with feeling loved: the belief that we need to be more attractive, powerful, or successful; the idea that we need to hide our shortcomings; the notion that our partner needs to speak our love language; and the assumption that we can get our partner to love us more. However, research has shown that feeling loved does not come from changing ourselves or others, but from changing our conversations.
To give and receive more love, Lyubomirsky and Reis advise upgrading our approach to communication. This can be achieved by listening without interrupting, posing open-ended questions, and sharing our true feelings. By doing so, we can convey that we recognize the other person’s humanity and want them to be happy.
The Importance of Connection
Connection is essential for our well-being, and research has shown that it has a significant impact on both mental and physical health. In fact, studies have found that people who have strong social connections tend to have lower blood pressure, healthier body mass indexes, and a lower risk of depression and anxiety.
Despite the importance of connection, many of us struggle to form and maintain meaningful relationships. This can be due to various factors, including our busy schedules, social media, and the pressure to present a perfect image. However, by prioritizing connection and being intentional about our relationships, we can build stronger, more meaningful bonds with others.
Original reporting: KRDO (Colorado Springs metro) — read the source article.
