By OBBM Network Editorial Staff

Samantha Horwitz and Dave Salerno

“I was crying, like, ‘Oh my God, what was me?’” Chris Hoyer said, his voice shaking as he remembered the night his fellow officer, Dave Glasser, was killed. The loss was the catalyst that pushed him off the streets of Phoenix and into a long, painful journey of self‑discovery. In a recent conversation with Sam Horwitz and David Solerno on A Badge of Honor TV, Chris Hoyer opened up about the emotional toll of policing, the gaps in departmental mental‑health support, and the surprising role his memoir played in his recovery.

From the Front Lines to the Edge of Burnout

Hoyer’s career spanned two decades, a period he describes as both “the time of my life” and a relentless grind. “I was having a ball,” he said, “I was doing again, like we do. I was just…” The turning point arrived on May 18, 2016, when his partner, Officer Dave Glasser, was killed in the line of duty. Hoyer admits that day marked the moment he “checked out,” though he didn’t fully grasp the impact until two years later, after his 2018 retirement.

He recounts a later incident that amplified his inner turmoil: an undercover chase that ended in a reckless accident. “I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings and that’s how I ended up causing that accident,” Hoyer confessed. The fallout included an administrative notice of investigation, which he describes as a “hit with moral injury” that deepened his sense of failure.

Gaps in Peer Support and Mental‑Health Resources

The conversation turned to the state of mental‑health programs within the Phoenix Police Department at the time of Hoyer’s service. While he acknowledges that the department “had my back” in many respects, he also notes a reluctance to share his story with strangers at headquarters. “I didn’t necessarily agree with… having to tell my story to a bunch of strangers,” he said, highlighting a common barrier that many officers face when seeking help.

Hoyer’s experience reflects broader challenges in law‑enforcement culture, where stigma often prevents officers from accessing available resources. He points out that, despite the department’s support, the lack of structured peer‑support mechanisms left many, including himself, to navigate trauma largely on their own.

The Pandemic‑Era Memoir: A Lifeline in Print

In March 2020, as COVID‑19 locked down the nation, Hoyer’s book—written with the help of his wife—was released. “Everybody was stuck reading in the house,” he noted, seeing a silver lining in the timing. The memoir, a raw account of his career, personal loss, and emotional battles, became an unexpected therapeutic tool.

Hoyer describes the writing process as cathartic: “The writing was all mine. She basically just fixed it up, made it look pretty…” He credits his wife’s editorial work for shaping the manuscript, yet emphasizes that the core narrative was his own. The book’s reception was powerful; a listener told him, “I couldn’t put your book down, I read it in one sitting,” underscoring the resonance of his story with both fellow officers and civilians.

Faith, Community, and the Path Forward

Interwoven throughout Hoyer’s testimony is a thread of faith. This aligns with the broader mission of A Badge of Honor TV, which partners with Patriot Mobile—a Christian‑conservative wireless provider to spotlight first‑responder heroes and promote values such as life, liberty, and community service.

Hoyer’s narrative also highlights the importance of community outreach. By sharing his story at speaking engagements across the country, he hopes to raise awareness about the mental‑health challenges officers face and encourage departments to strengthen peer‑support programs. “People need to understand what we go through and take the high road,” he urged.

Lessons for Law Enforcement and the Public

The conversation between Hoyer, Horwitz, and Solerno underscores a crucial lesson: addressing mental‑health needs in policing requires both institutional change and personal storytelling. While the Phoenix department provided some backing, Hoyer’s experience shows that without proactive, confidential peer networks, officers may fall through the cracks.

His memoir serves as a model for how personal narrative can bridge that gap, offering both a therapeutic outlet for the writer and an educational resource for peers and civilians alike. As the nation continues to grapple with the mental‑health fallout of the pandemic, Hoyer’s story reminds us that healing often begins with honest conversation.

In a climate where talk is cheap, Hoyer’s lived experience adds depth to the ongoing dialogue about law‑enforcement wellbeing. By confronting his own vulnerabilities and sharing them publicly, he exemplifies the resilience and accountability that can strengthen both the badge and the community it serves.

The full episode of A Badge of Honor TV is available on OBBM Network TV.